Recently on LinkedIn, I shared a post about Zach Mercurio’s recent Harvard Business Review article, The Power of Mattering at Work. The article confirmed what many of us have observed for years. When people believe they are significant at work, they thrive. When they don’t, we see the consequences: quiet quitting, disengagement, and high turnover.
Mercurio’s article underscores the reason I became a Gallup-certified Strengths Coach. The CliftonStrengths assessment helps people recognize their significance and see how they matter. When we understand our strengths, we get clarity about our contributions, move past our limiting beliefs, and show up as ourselves at work.
For parents, here’s what is also true: when we help our children understand their unique strengths—just like we do with adults at work—we’re giving them the foundation for real confidence, especially during the tween years when they’re figuring out who they are.
The Gap We Don’t See
We know our kids face more pressure and self-doubt than previous generations.
Research backs up what we’re seeing at home: this generation is struggling with anxiety and uncertainty about who they are and what they’re capable of.
Here’s what’s encouraging: when children understand their natural talents and see them valued, they develop the kind of real confidence that protects them during these vulnerable years.
As leaders, many of us know how to spot and develop strengths in our teams, but when it comes to our children, we sometimes default back to focusing on what needs to be fixed.
It might be because of the pressure we feel for our kids to be “successful”—to get good grades, make the team, fit in with the right crowd. When we’re worried about their performance and how it reflects on us as parents, it’s natural to focus on weaknesses rather than celebrate strengths that might make them different.
Mercurio’s research shows that people thrive when they feel both valued and valuable. That same shift—from focusing on what’s wrong to building on what’s right—is what our tweens need most.
Join Me on Wednesday, June 11
This Wednesday at 7:00 p.m., I’m hosting a webinar called “
Raising Confident Tweens: A Strengths-Based Approach.” I’ll share the four clues to natural talents, show you how to reframe challenging behaviors as potential strengths, and give you language that helps your tween build confidence from the inside out.
Whether your tween loves organizing, asks endless questions, or gravitates toward helping others, there are specific ways to support their unique wiring.
If you have a tween or early teen, I hope you’ll join me. You can register
here.
Leadership and parenting aren’t separate skills. They’re both about recognizing potential and creating conditions for growth. The confidence we’re building in ourselves? That’s exactly what we can help our children develop, too.
PS – Here’s a slide from the webinar so you can get an idea of what you’ll learn!
